Today’s story is by me and artwork was created by Zach Rodis. Visit his website by clicking on the image or check out his blog.
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Tag Archives: funny
The Melancholy Robot and the Office Workers
Posted in flash fiction, The Melancholy Robot
Tagged art, beauty, dennis finocchiaro, entertainment, fiction, flash fiction, funny, humor, illustrations, office workers, people, relationships, robot, sad robot, sad workers, the daily grind, work, writing, zach rodis
As You Wish
Xander shifted his pillow a little so his head was more comfortable as he read when Zoey gasped at something on her laptop. He looked over at her.
“What’s up?”
“Peter Falk died. I loved him in Princess Bride.”
“Peter Falk died? Inconceivable.”
“Nice,” she said. “Seriously though, he was amazing in that movie.”
“He was also Columbo. And he was in Vibes with Jeff Goldblum and Cindi Lauper. But yeah, I’ll always remember him as the grandfather. I love that movie.”
“It’s a classic.”
“Hello, my name is Indigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
“Stop saying that!”
Xander dropped his book and stabbed her in the shoulder with an invisible sword.
“Promise me money! Promise me wealth!” he yelled as he jumped up and down on the bed pretending to stab her as she pretended to die.
He dropped down and flopped back onto his side of the bed.
“Remember when we had those ROUSs in the old apartment?” she asked.
“Rodents of unusual size? I don’t think they exist.” He paused to catch his breath a little. “And of course I remember those rats. Not as big as in the movie, but scary nonetheless.”
She read a bit of the bio and sighed.
He knew he had to cheer her up. “Fezzik, are there rocks ahead?”
She smiled. “If there are we’ll all be dead!”
“Stop that rhyming now, I mean it!”
“Anybody want a peanut?”
“I love that part when Peter Falk says something about television being called books in his day. Classic. And when he skips the final kiss? Priceless.”
“I just loved his role. I didn’t grow up with a grandfather…but when I was a kid I liked to pretend mine was just like him.”
He looked over at her and smiled. “Love you, Zo.” Then he started tickling her until she couldn’t breathe.
Once she could speak again she playfully frowned at him. “Okay, okay, you’re bothering me. Go to bed. I’ll likely kill you in the morning.”
He kissed her goodnight. “As you wish.”
Posted in flash fiction, Zoey and Xander
Tagged As you wish, beauty, childhood, Cindi Lauper, Columbo, couples, dating, dennis finocchiaro, entertainment, family, Fezzik, fiction, flash fiction, friends, funny, hipster, humor, inconceivable, Indigo Montoya, Jeff Goldblum, kitsch, life, love, people, Peter Falk, pictures, relationships, romance, sad, The Princess Bride, very short story, Vibes, vss, writing, you killed my father prepare to die
Upcoming Feature!
I’m introducing my upcoming series of flash fiction pieces titled The Melancholy Robot for a reason. I’ve written a bunch of very short stories about a sad robot and asked for volunteers in the artistic community, mostly in the Philadelphia area, but also with a little help from some friends from afar. So far I’ve gotten a good response from people, so I’m excited to tell you that coming on Monday will be the first installment of
If you are an artist who would like to get in on this, please comment here with your email and I will gladly get back to you. Otherwise, I hope everyone enjoys the new short series. Each artist volunteer is given a vss (very short story) about the robot and is given creative freedom to draw, paint, illustrate, or whatever a scene or variety of scenes from the vss. It’s been REALLY fun so far, seeing what people come up with. So obviously, each robot will look different and they could be all kinds of different mediums, but hey, that’s part of what makes it fun!
Stay tuned, readers! Should be a blast. First story is coming on Monday.
-Den
Posted in flash fiction, The Melancholy Robot
Tagged art, artists, beauty, collaboration, creating, dennis finocchiaro, drawing, entertainment, fiction, flash fiction, friends, funny, humor, kitsch, life, painting, people, robot, sad robot, sculpting, The Melancholy Robot
Nooooo!
“Nooooo!” he screamed, at the top of his lungs, towards the heavens.
“Stop being so dramatic,” she said. “I’ll be back in a few days.”
Posted in flash fiction, Zoey and Xander
Tagged couples, dating, dennis finocchiaro, dependence, entertainment, fiction, flash fiction, funny, holiday, humor, kitsch, life, love, overdependent, relationships, romance, vacation, very short story, vss, writing
She sat
She sat on the hardwood floor, looking out the window as if it were television. Two children played…an old woman shook dust from a carpet…a car drove by…a dog sniffed the ground then urinated.
Her cable was out.
Posted in flash fiction
Tagged activity, beauty, dennis finocchiaro, dogs, entertainment, fiction, flash fiction, funny, humor, kitsch, life, neighbors, people, people watching, relationships, sad, the cable is out, writing
The Ghost Train
The dilapidated railroad station, aged after years of disuse, loomed above them like a ghost as they trudged up the hill.
“I always come up here when I want to be alone. You’re the first person I’ve brought here.”
She smiled, a little out of breath from the steep path.
The rusted rails disappeared into surrounding woods as she looked left, then right.
“The tracks are unused now, right?”
“Are you nervous?” he said with a smile. “They’re retired. Look at them.” He kicked a bit of rusted metal off the top. “I doubt they’d be safe run a train over them.”
She took his hand. “Thanks for bringing me here. I know this place means a lot to you. Do you ever go inside?”
“There’s a broken window around back, but it’s pretty dirty in there.”
A sound, far off in the distance, made her look to the right. “What was that?”
“I don’t know, but I hear it all the time.”
“It sounded like-“
“Go on…”
“No, never mind.”
He bent down and put his hand on the track. “Feel it.”
She did as she was told and felt the slight vibration. “What is that?”
“You were going to say it sounded like a train was coming, right?”
She nodded, a little unwillingly.
“I hear it all the time. And after I hear it, I can always feel the tracks vibrating the tiniest bit.”
She quickly removed her hand from the rusted metal. She wiped the brown dust off her hands onto her jeans as he stood back up. She stood as well and watched the tracks coming from the woods to the right, waiting.
“It won’t come,” he said, breaking the silence.
“What won’t?”
“The train.”
She took his hand, and squeezed it tight from fear when they heard the sound again, this time closer. It sounded like the echoes of the horn of a train, but not the actual sound itself. She continued to watch, waiting.
Photograph taken by Nessa Skotnitsky of Ethereal Fine Art and Photography.
Posted in flash fiction, Zoey and Xander
Tagged art, beauty, couples, dating, dennis finocchiaro, entertainment, Ethereal Fine Art and Photography, fiction, fine art, flash fiction, friends, friendship, funny, ghost train, ghosts, hipster, horror, humor, kitsch, life, love, Nessa Skotnitsky, old buildings, people, photo, photograph, photography, photos, pictures, relationships, retro, romance, train station, train tracks, trains, vintage
Dangers of the Ocean
New typography with my brand new (vintage) typewriter! Here’s a few shots of the typewriter, too! Check out my last post for news about my upcoming book, Capturing a Moment, collecting fifty of my works together in one volume! Some are also available on my Etsy for a limited time!
Images of the new typewriter which even types in RED:
Posted in flash fiction, Typography
Tagged 1950s, 1960s, art, beach, beauty, childhood, children, dennis finocchiaro, entertainment, family, fear, fiction, flash fiction, found art, found photograph, funny, humor, jumping waves, kitsch, life, ocean, people, photo, photograph, photography, photos, pictures, retro, shore, stepping on a crab, typography, vintage, writing
My Second Book, Coming Soon!
Coming soon! Wrags Ink., a new publisher in the Philadelphia area, is putting 
out a collection of my typography on vintage photographs! You’ve seen some of them before here and possibly on my Etsy, but this collection has about fifty images and more than half of them have never been seen before! So get ready, readers! My work is also being featured in a few magazines coming out this summer, and I’ll be sure to let you know about that as it comes up!
Also, once the book is out the prices will probably be going up a bit on my Etsy, so if you want any, better get them soon!
Thanks for reading!
Posted in flash fiction, photos of strangers, Typography
Tagged 1940s, 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, art, beauty, childhood, children, couples, dating, death, dennis finocchiaro, entertainment, family, fiction, flash fiction, found art, found photograph, friends, friendship, funny, hipster, horror, humor, kitsch, life, love, marriage, music, people, photo, photograph, photography, photos, pictures, poetry, reading, records, relationships, retro, romance, sad, typewriter, typography, vintage, writing
Guilty Conscience
“Guilty! Guilty!”
His client jumped a little and then shook uncontrollably in her seat as the lawyer looked over at his pet and said “I really need to get rid of that parrot.”
Posted in flash fiction
Tagged bird, fiction, flash fiction, funny, guilt, guilty, humor, joke, lawyers, parrot, talking bird
Fulfilled Dreams
“When you find all of your dreams fulfilled, it’s time to think up more dreams.”
She looked up at him. “Huh? What’s that from?”
“Me, I guess,” he said with a large, goofy smile. “My dreams are all fulfilled.”
“Really. How so?”
“I have this house I made into a home. My first book is published. And then there’s you. I love going to work most of the time. I am not starving to death, I have my health, you know. My dreams are fulfilled.”
“And?”
“And it’s time for new dreams. Time to start reaching higher.”
“Like…another book?”
“And maybe another girlfriend.”
“Very funny.”
“I thought so.”
She threw the copy of ReadyMade she was reading at him but he ducked. “See? Everything’s coming up me right now. You couldn’t even hit me with -”
Another magazine hit him square in the face.
“Nice.”
She smiled. “Gotcha! Don’t be so cocky!”
“Hey, can I help it if I’m happy?”
“I’m glad I’m on that list,” she said, getting up and walking over to the couch.
“That doesn’t mean I want to cuddle.”
“Tough. I came over here to cuddle, and cuddle I will.”
“Fine,” he said in his pretend-frustrated voice. He put his arm around her and pulled her in.
“What’s this you’re working on?” she asked, picking up the notebook he had been writing in.
“Ideas. For my next book.”
“Nice.”
“Like I said, new dreams. Not like my first book is doing well. Even the publisher said it wasn’t selling much. Maybe I can use this to get an agent. Or maybe this is the start of something bigger. It just takes the right person to read it, someone like Chuck Klosterman to tweet it, and next thing I know, it starts selling like crazy.”
“Or?”
“Or nothing. I got a book published. It was one of my dreams. I’m happy. It feels good.”
She dropped the notebook onto the floor and it landed on her crumpled magazine she’d used as a weapon just moments ago.
“Let’s go upstairs,” she said after resting her chin on his shoulder.
He smiled. “See? I’m getting everything I want.”
She got up and threw the magazine at his face again.
Posted in flash fiction, Uncategorized, Zoey and Xander
Tagged couples, dating, dreams, entertainment, fiction, flash fiction, found photograph, funny, happiness, happy, hipster, humor, kitsch, my first novel, novel, photograph, photography, photos, pictures, published, reading, ReadyMade, relationships, romance, writing
A Flash of Inspiration 